Saturday, May 31, 2008

Murder Most Fowl

No, my spelling isn't off. I saw this on Amazon and thought it looked cute. I'm not paying fifteen bucks for it, but still. Maybe when the used price goes down I'll get it and do a review.

The Pain! The Agony! The Rejection!

I received my first rejection e-mail for Lost Days, a novel I'm trying to get published. I am quite proud of myself. Not once tonight did I burst into tears of frustrated despondency. I came close during my second break but I think that might have more to do with the fact that my supervisor put me on a three card poker table, my least favorite game to deal.

Okay. Perhaps the rejection got to me a little more than I'm willing to admit. I put a lot of time and effort into that manuscript. I wrote the first draft in only a month, but the revisions that followed were endless. I started that thing in November for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writer's Month) and finished a little less than a month ago. Yes, it's probably crap, but does not the mother still bare love for the child sprung from her loins even though said child has the face of a mutated baboon? Does not the foolish gambler put his money down time and time again until he no longer has money to pay the light bill even though he knows in his heart of hearts the house always wins? And why does he do it? Because he loves the game, that's why! The game may not especially love him, but damn it, one day his ship will come in!

It's with this gambler's mentality that I set sail on yet another doomed voyage that will ultimately sink before it makes it back to shore...I guess you can see from my sailing metaphors why my manuscript didn't make it. I'm writing the next book in the series. While I do that, I will also be going over my first novel to see where I went wrong. Maybe I was just too eager and it can be saved with...sigh...a little more revision. Maybe it's a baboon faced hell spawn with no hope of redemption. We'll just have to see.

In the meantime, I've decided to post my rejection e-mail for your entertainment. Maybe I'll print it up and set the thing on fire. Picture it: A distraught Karma Girl with a half empty bottle of apple flavored schnapps in one hand and a burning rejection slip in the other. I'll wave it like a flag signaling my maddening decent while wailing bitterly that no one understands my work. I'll threaten to slice an artery to show them how committed (ha ha) I am to the art! And as I stand there bleeding with rivers of black mascara trickling down my pale cheeks, I'll remember that I don't own a fire extinguisher and burn my apartment down, thereby making me a homeless as well as starving artist...

But no, I'm not bitter or anything (shakes head emphatically)...oh no, not me.

May 30, 2008

Dear {name deleated...thinking of using this as a pen name..hmmm):

Thank you so much for sending the Nelson Agency sample pages of LOST DAYS.

After a careful reading, we are sorry to say that we don't believe this project is right for our agency.

Because this business is so subjective and opinions vary widely, we recommend that you pursue other agents. After all, it just takes one "yes" to find the right match.

Good luck with all your publishing endeavors.


Sincerely,

Kristin Nelson
Sara Megibow

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

June 2008 Is Villain Month

And I've been invited! Yay! (Insert happy dance here)

From the ElizaW of tales of a fantasy scribbler:

While I was drawing up some ideas for what I could do for my four weeks of villainy, I thought that perhaps I could invite some of my blogging comrades to join in.

I’ll be spending one week on each character, starting June 1st. Activities will include sample dialog, sketches, scanned collages, and bits of story that don’t go anywhere, as well as the usual ‘character info’ pages that asks for full names and favorite snacks.




Interested? Leave a comment on her site.

500 Word Nano

Molly Mcfee strutted down the avenue arm and arm with Malicious Intent. Everyone on the strip knew Maledict “Malicious Intent” Cartwright had come into some money as of late, though where it had come from was something of a mystery. Molly didn’t care a fig so long as he was willing to pay for her “services” and buy her a round or two at the corner pub.

They crossed paths with Constable Oliver Toliver, a local bobby making his rounds. Sneering and twirling his night stick, the good constable blocked Malicious and Molly's path on the street.

“Good day to ya, officer,” said Malicious with a gracious tip of his dusty brown bowler.

Constable Toliver pointed his baton in Malicious’ face. “Me and the rest of the boys at the Yard have been looking for you, Intent.”

“And what would London’s finest be wantin’ from the likes of me?”

“I know it were you that done the Mayfair job. Admit it!”

“I couldn’t ‘av done it copper,” Malicious gave the Constable a Cheshire cat grin. “I was with Molly here all night. Weren’t I, love?”

Molly nodded her pretty little head. Constable Toliver scowled.

“You think the judge will take the word of a brazen hussy such as she?”

Molly pouted at the insult.

“If you don’t believe me ask around,” said Malicious. “The whole of Pettigrew Street heard her crying out my name last night.”

Molly giggled as Constable Toliver growled at the two of them. His knuckles whitened as his grip tightened on his night stick. For a second, Molly thought he would use it. The man calmed, smiled.

“One of these days, Intent, you will slip you will,” he said through gritted teeth. “I just hope I’m there to see you fall flat on your arse when you do.”

“I’ll be sure to stuff a pillow down me drawers in preparation for that fine day,” said Malicious giving the open mouthed bobby another tip of his hat as Molly and he went on their way.

When the constable was out of earshot Molly whispered, “So it was you that did it!”

“Don’t be daft. I was nowhere near Mayfair last night.”

“Then why did you tell him you was with me?”

Malicious smiled. “Just ‘cause I didn’t do the Mayfair job don’t mean I wasn’t doing something else, if you be getting’ my meaning.”

He winked and Molly giggled. He took her to the pub where there was much imbibing on Molly’s end, followed by a quick tryst up at Molly’s one room fire trap on Pettigrew where the other tenants exalted in Molly’s melodious utterances accompanied by the squeaks of the Molly’s worn bed.

The symphony was over, Molly lay back with a sigh and immediately fell asleep thanks to the sleepy drops Malicious added to her ale. He climbed back into his clothes, removed the bloody straight razor hidden in his right boot, and hid it in the clutter under Molly’s bed.

“I told you true. I wasn’t near Mayfair,” he said, placing a kiss upon the whore’s sweat covered brow. “And when Constable Toliver gets word of the murder down on Marley, a little bird will tell him just where to find the culprit,” he said and left her to take the rap.

Monday, May 26, 2008

I Need Structure, Damn It!

Structure and goals. To keep my brain from leaking out of my ears, I've decided to give myself the following writing goals:



1) Write a 500 word story (nano story).



2) Write 1,000 (not counting the nano story or any other projects) words a day for my second novel until finished or November.



3) Update all blogs at least once a week.



4) Perform three miracles. Finishing the above three will count towards this goal.

School, NaNoWriMo, and What Karma Has Been Inflicted Upon Me Thus Far

I start the summer semester at Delgado on the 2nd of next month. I've decided to try to get certified for Massage therapy. I want to be a masseuse . No not a "masseuse" (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) but a law abiding professional massage therapist. There will be no happy ending for my clients, sad to say. So far, I've taken most of the prerequisite biology courses except for AP II (anatomy and physiology II lecture). Unfortunately, I can't fit any of the MSTH classes because the only classes available over the summer are the ones I won't be able to take until I get biology out of the way. I would have gotten this over with sooner if I hadn't taken last semester off.

I know, I know. She who procrastinates never gets anything done, but I got caught up editing a novel I wrote for NaNoWriMo and couldn't concentrate on any of my classes. Because I wouldn't be me if I didn't do everything ass-backwards, I made my 50,000 word limit on time without actually entering the contest. Don't ask me why. I started late, didn't think I'd finish what I started, figured school and work would get in the way, but I finished it. It's not like I would have won a cash prize anyway.

I spent the next few months editing and am proud to say I have completed the final draft. Now I'm waiting to hear from an agent who asked to see my first thirty pages (sigh). I'm not hopeful. Okay, I'm hopeful, but I'm not expecting much. If worse comes to worse, maybe I'll publish it as a blook on Pages Unbound ( http://www.pagesunbound.com/ ), though it would be nice if I could see the thing in print, get a paycheck for it, and quit my job(insert hysterical laughter here). Here are a few other projects I'm working on until that miraculous day shall come:

http://agathasghost.blogspot.com/
http://theblessingcurse.blogspot.com/

You can also find me on http://www.thisisby.us/ as karmagrl76. Vote for me!!! Wooh Hoo!

Meanwhile, I drudge away at my thankless job dealing cards to whiny gamblers. I've gotten to the point where I run on automatic when I'm dealing to a table. I'll smile and try to make conversation but I'm not really there. The management has made so many unpopular changes that most of the people I worked with two years ago have moved on to other casinos. When we complain they either give us a form letter excuse or take something away from us. I no longer have a locker because a few people complained they had been waiting months for one. They were too cheap to buy extra lockers (I heard they only really needed fifty or so) so now you have to request one when you come in. I know it's a small thing, but it's just one more thing on a long list of unpopular decisions that are driving people away. And to add insult to injury, our toke rate is down and the people upstairs are blaming the dealers for not smiling pretty enough. At least, that's what management believes. Hmm.

My only hope is to get published or to get through school and find a better job. I'm toying with the idea of changing my name from Karma Girl to Charity Girl. I'll stand outside in the casino parking lot with a little cup and a sign and a sad story to tell. I'd probably make more money.