The Problem With Witnessing

I was reading a Reddit post on r/atheism just a moment ago that piqued my interest. A mental health counselor was disturbed by their colleague's attitude toward proselytizing in the field. One of their colleagues spoke up during a Zoom training that it frustrated her that others in the field were "witnessing" to their clients, and that it was unprofessional. While the OP agreed with the complaining coworker, the others did not. In fact, they got down right defensive. Of course, OP lives in Tennessee, Bible Belt Central, so, no big surprise there. I live in Southern Louisiana which is not better when it comes to keeping your faith and other hot-topic opinions to yourself. It reminded me about the time my last shrink told me in not so many words that my mental health would benefit from a relationship with the Big G. I, of course, dropped her like a hot potato the second I left her office. And this got me thinking about the problem with witnessing.

I'm an agnostic leaning toward atheist. I have absolutely no problem when someone tells me they are a Christian, Muslim, Buddhist...whatever. That's fine. What irritates me, and the thing I find most unprofessional in the workplace, is if that same person tries to convert me even after I've told them I'm not interested in their spiel. To be fair, it hasn't happened often at work. In the past, it was usually born-again family members trying to lead me back to the fold or people knocking on my door at inopportune hours of the day, somehow right when I'm on the toilet, or in desperate need of one, to tell me the virtues of their church and how I'm going to suffer for all eternity if I don't believe in their god. I wonder if their version of hell has a circle with no restrooms, and if they're just trying to get me used to my eternal damnation while I'm here on Earth doing the pee-pee dance.

It got me to thinking, however, what I would do if one of my coworkers got fanatical. You can walk away from a family member or slam the door in the face of a persistent Mormon missionary. Stopping unwanted holy advances from someone you have no choice but to deal with on a daily basis is trickier. So, I thought it through and came up with a rock solid strategy. It's always good to know where the safety exits are in any life situation.

I'd be polite the first time it happened. I'd tell them I'm not a believer and I have no wish to become one. If they were fool enough to come at me again, I would tell them, "Sorry, not interested. Please let's keep our relationship professional and not discus religion." If they persisted a third time, I'd straight up threaten to report them. Some of my more religious readers might clutch their pearls at this, claiming religious oppression, but that couldn't be further from the truth. This isn't me attacking a good Christian, just doing his/her thing. I realize you guys have to recruit, but when your intended devotee gives you the brush off multiple times, perhaps it's time to take the hint. You're no longer "witnessing". You're harassing, and that's a problem. Imagine someone of a different faith doing this to you. Imagine they told you your god is a lie and everything you believe is wrong. Now imagine they just. Won't. Stop. You'd tire of it too.

And before you tell me I'm picking on Christians exclusively, I'm not. I'd do this to anyone pestering me about their faith. The thing is, I have rarely ever gotten this from any other religion other than Christians. You guys have a freaking hardcore, gotta catch 'em all attitude for converting nonbelievers, and that is a BIG turn off. It's what makes the rest of us cringe when you tell us you are a Christian. Because we know what's coming, and that makes us put our guard up.

So when you go into work, and people are giving you the stink eye, just know it's not because of your religion. It's how you present it. You not only lost a convert by your actions, but you lost anyone who that person gripes to. In the age of the internet, that's a lot of souls you're responsible for, and you're probably going to burn in hell for it. Just kidding. I don't believe in hell.

But, no, you probably are.