Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Facebook PM Mating Call 3: Fun with Perverts

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times. Facebook pervs are desperate. They must be if they're trying to hit up this. Then again, maybe there are some places where big boned women with a US citizenship such as myself are highly desirable. The common theme amongst all of these guys is that they are usually foreign. Well, that and their spelling grammar are atrocious. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not perfect when it comes to this, but at least I use spellcheck. At least I try, damn it!
 
Case in point: Jame Smith. Mr. Smith wanted to be "friends" because of my lovely appearance. Also, his thoughts went "wide"? I'm not sure what that means, but sure. Why not:
 
 
Jame Smith

Hello, what a lovely profile, you look lovely beyond imagination, i came across your lovely profile, my thought went wide, and i had to tell you how i feel about your lovely appearance, it will be a pleasure to be a close friend of yours. awaiting to read from you soon.

 
Karen Williams

Um, thanks. I guess. I'll be sure to tell my husband what a catch I am. I am unsure if having "wide" thoughts is good thing or a bad thing, but I suppose wide thoughts are better than narrow ones, so good for you. I'm a bit confused, however, as to why you think finding someone has a "lovely appearance" warrants a need to suddenly make friends with a total stranger. If you said you thought my posts were interesting, I might have had more faith in your sincerity regarding friendship. I don't think I could ever be close friends with anyone who cared more about what my profile picture looks like than the person I am. This is probably why I love my husband as much as I do. My husband. The wonderful guy I married. But if you still want to be friends, please read this first. Read from it and learn from the mistakes of others before you: http://doomtown-doomtown.blogspot.com/2014/04/facebook-pm-mating-call-2-take-hint-perv.html?m=1
 
 
 
Jame Smith

hello thanks for your response to me, how are you doing today? hope to hear form you soon?
 
 
Karen Williams

You...did read my last message, right? I hope there's no confusion. I hate confusion almost as much as I hate run-on sentences and improper use of punctuation.

Joshua Whitacker gave me a severe case of grammar whiplash. I may never recover:
 
Joshua Whitaker
Joshua Whitaker
hi how are you? i hope your ok do have a good day in god name. i am single, i hope to be with a beautiful lady with u.
 
Karen Williams
Karen Williams
I'm doing pretty good. I have a little acid reflux going on, and my left ankle hurts a bit, but other than that, I'm fine. Thanks for asking! I was having a really good day...That is, until your message gave me grammar whiplash. The first letter at the start of every sentence should be capitalized, "your" should be "you're", "god name" should be "God's name" (I'll give you some leeway over the capitalization of "god" depending on your level of devotion to the Guy upstairs), and I'm pretty sure you should have ended the sentence at "ok" (okay or o.k. would be better, but I'm willing to let this slide also). For example, "I hope you're okay. Do have a good day in God's name." Sounds better, doesn't it?
 
You say you're single? Well, good for you! I remember the days when I was single. They were good times, but to be honest, I prefer the married life. Being married is so awesome. I can only hope you will someday find a beautiful lady to be with "u" (insert cringe here). Unfortunately, that lady will not be me, what with the fact that I'm married, as was previously mentioned. I can give you some good advice regarding finding a life mate, however, and my advice is as follows: Brush up on your grammar and spelling, and stop trolling married women on Facebook.
 
Have a good day!
 
Joshua Whitaker
Karen Williams
Karen Williams
Wow. Or: Wow!
 
Joshua Whitaker
Joshua Whitaker
I'm not hear for joking I'm man of god
 
Karen Williams
Karen Williams
I'm not joking either. Your grammar needs massive improvement. But by the grace of "god", I'm sure you will someday overcome this affliction. An editor might help too. Just saying.
 
Joshua Whitaker
Joshua Whitaker
Have u marry
 
Joshua Whitaker
Joshua Whitaker
Nice to meet u. i will like to express my self to u you.. i am very sweet and easy going person. i see the silver lining to every cloud. i also see humor in everything and love to laugh. I have strong values and more is i'm single Man I m ready to be faithful and a responsible man who have fear of god will never accept a anything short of commitment. I'm form Nigeria. Study. Mechanic Engineering and work with in M T N for and i also love my job as a professional. In my work. and 4'8ft,green and you can as will facilitate the process if my relationship with you grow rapidly. have developed my interest in you and it will remain their forever, love is war easy to start but very hard to put end, i promise to keep you.
 
Karen Williams
Karen Williams
Are you asking me if I'm married? See man, this is what I'm talking about! Bad grammar makes for some wacky confusion. But yes, I am married and happily so.
 
Joshua Whitaker

 
Ok


Abhijit Singh keeps calling me "baby" and "my dear". This was after he tried hitting up my sister when he didn't get anywhere with me, so I just started ignoring his ass:
 
Abhijit Singh
Abhijit Singh
hi
 
November 27, 2013
 
Abhijit Singh
Abhijit Singh
hi babay
 

November 29, 2013
 
Abhijit Singh
Abhijit Singh
hello
hi
wat da hell

 

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